I feel like I has said that sentence a lot lately. From my Doctor to friends, and family “I’m just not hungry” has become a sort of mantra, and one that is stark and blunt.
My world is surrounded by food. Intentional or otherwise, I see food all the time. On facebook, I belong to a group for People who have had Bariatric Surgery. On it, they are sharing tons and tons of recipes and how to make food. Cauliflower Grilled Cheese, Carb Free everything, very Keto diet stuff… and I think to myself “How can you all be hungry?”
I talk to friends who have had similar procedures. And they say the hunger comes back, but even then they are surprised that I am not hungry 2.5 weeks later. Right now, there is just no desire to eat. No thoughts about food unless I am prompted, and even more interesting, some food smells actually turn me off and make me slightly nauseous. I am asked how much I eat a day, and it is starting to become uncomfortable to answer, mostly because there isn’t much to eat. Sure, the pureed foods are good, but in reality, it is a tiny amount of food, and I don’t want to startle people. A few days ago, I bought a 180gram container of Greek Yogurt, and I have like 3-5 teaspoons of it a day… if I feel hungry. I don’t eat if I am not hungry, and honestly… I barely eat. three days later, I still have 60% of the container left, and no signs of finishing.
Is this normal? I think it is… my body is trying to get to a new equilibrium, and it has plenty of fat stores for me to get there. I lose weight every day, and I feel fine. I now mostly eat so that I can keep energy up. People tell me this is how thin people live, but it boggles my mind that people can never be hungry. It is weird to not plan what you want to eat later, it is weird to not think about more than the next meal. Eating is starting to become a chore, and am unsure how I ultimately feel about that.
Emotionally, the thought seems to drop into a black hole. I “miss” food, but I am also not thinking about food much, so I don’t *really* miss it. I something talk about foods I will eat, but I find it more perfunctory to say that actually believing it. In a way, I talked about the Banana Smoothie in the hopes that it would kickstart hunger, or a craving, or anything, but it hasn’t happened. I have no desire for another smoothie right now, so I won’t force it… but it is so very strange.
I am sure that in a week or two, I will be posting about raging hunger pains, or cravings for things I cannot have… but for now… its pretty much nothin.
Update: I actually messaged the Bariatric social group, and apparently, I am not alone with the loss of hunger. Some people get it back immediately, others take months. I am in the middle at the moment. So, there is some relief in that.